Here is an excellent TED Talk that unpacks the trauma associated with infidelity.

I've cheated multiple times. It could be very frustrating and excruciating to say I know my husband has cheated on me several times. Ive cheated on her multiple times with six different girls in the past five months. Since then we had gotten really close.

Learning how to forgive someone who cheated on you multiple times has one answer. Identifying the factors that caused you to be unfaithful can help prevent you from cheating again see likely to cheat. That makes you equal if not more of the problem.

You cheated 3 times on him. The good news is that things can be better. I mean you had an abortion so he wouldnt find out but he did.

At the very least you should be doing couples counseling if you have any hope of this surviving. A marriage can survive cheating multiple times and still come back better than before but its not about forgetting it ever happened because it would just happen again. Knowing that you cannot cause another person to cheat must also be understood.

Knowing that you cannot cause another person to change must be clearly understood. The whole point of coming clean is so that the two of you can put the incident behind you. Ive been married for almost six years and Im in the process of divorcing still looking for an attorney.

In the first weeks even months after the discovery of unfaithfulness a lot of powerful emotions will take place. Whether youve dealt with many indiscretions from one person or wound up with a series of individuals prone to stepping outside the relationship boundaries being cheated on hurts and it can affect your sense of self. Fire ie you hurt me so Ill hurt you but cheating should never be used as a weapon.